Lucy approaches the iMac after practicing her poem. Benedict and Veronica join her.

Did you finish your poem?

Lucy: “Yes."

What is the title and the author?

Lucy: “The Snail by William Cowper."

Benedict: “By William Caterpillar."

He wrote it so long ago, he’s now William Butterfly.

Trump Orders Drone Strike On Venezuelan Olympic Cross-Country Skier - Babylon Bee

“What an explosive finish for Claveau-Laviolette,” she added. “Wow!”

Morning blend.

☕️

Big day.

❤️

I love a good heated steering wheel.

Turning Point USA Announces Alternative Puerto Rico - The Onion

“Finally, Americans will be able to enjoy a family-friendly tropical paradise that actually celebrates traditional values,” said Turning Point CEO Erika Kirk, adding that the island would be known as “Port Rick,” a mistranslation of “Puerto Rico”

Bible Authors Admit They Were Paid $7K For Every Reference To Israel - Babylon Bee

Hey, if the money is available, just take it. I was writing a ton about Israel anyway, for free, so why not make a little extra coin on the side? And people pretend like I’m the one who benefited from the arrangement the most, but I only had one book. You should have seen how much cash Moses came away with from the Pentateuch. ‘Israel this' and ‘Israel that.' He was the O.G. moneymaker with that deal.

Fraud Suspicions Arise As Somali Team Wins 734th Gold Medal At Winter Olympics - Babylon Bee

“Their culture just encourages overperformance at traditional Somalian activities… like snowboarding.”

Apple’s “new” version of iWork is such a departure.

Ads and upselling within the app is not something I really expect from them.

Creator Studio doesn’t make sense to pay $130 a year when I only use Pages & Numbers.

Kindergarten daughter requested her picture with the Nex Playground, but insisted that it have its “eyepatch on.”

After Relationship Between Parent And Child Irreparably Broken, Math Homework Is Done - Babylon Bee

According to Jennifer Fromm, her husband and child just finished the 4.5 hour one-on-one ordeal of reducing fractions, a marathon challenge which has now destroyed any hope they might have had of a positive relationship with one another.

Swimming lessons for the kids and I’m poolside wrangling my email.

Tools make it possible.

👨🏻‍💻

Where has the quarter-zip fleece been all my life?

It’s so easy to fall into a rut and forget to challenge the systems you put in place.

My work changed significantly six months ago, and I realized I was still doing things in the order that was optimized for the old work, not the new.

Day one, new plan.

Morning: Create; Afternoon: Administrate.

ChatGPT is better at .htaccess than I ever was.

The best part of the post-walk routine is the deep relaxation feeling when I finally sit down. Like laying down in bed after a really good day.

My brie game is strong.

Journalists Shocked To Be Laid Off From Obsolete Media Outlet That Loses $100 Million Annually - Babylon Bee

At publishing time, the paper’s owner, Jeff Bezos, admitted that he had forgotten that he owned it. “Seems like something I wouldn’t buy,” he said. “Really bad investment.”

Conquering the elements is a huge psychological boost.

It’s a whole different level when you look down and see evidence of yesterday’s work still there.

❄️